Why This Book?

Relationships don’t fall apart because we stop caring or wanting to collaborate with each other. 

They unravel because we forget to pause between the cue and the comeback—to remember that we have a choice.

Owning a moment isn’t about taking or assigning blame. 

It’s about claiming agency, curiosity, and compassion right where life is happening: between two nervous systems trying to connect in all that we have available -- moments.

Inside You’ll Explore:

• Why “being right” can cost you the connection you actually crave.
• How to see and name your patterns without turning them into enemies.
• The shift from reaction to resonance—how to stay open when everything in you wants to close.
• Practical, bite-sized practices for repairing trust, softening conflict, and deepening presence.

The Owner’s Manual for Thriving Relationships

By Mitch Abblett, PhD — Johns Hopkins University Press

Ever notice how relationships don’t come with an owner’s manual? Yeah, me too—and so I decided to write one.

Most of us think thriving means fixing others or finding “the one.” But the truth? It’s about owning the moments you’re in—especially the messy ones. The eye-rolls, the silences, the oh-crap-I-did-it-again moments. Those are your lab.

Next time you get triggered, pause and ask: What’s mine to own right now?

Not to blame—just to notice. That’s where connection actually starts.

The Owner’s Manual for Thriving Relationships isn’t about perfection or performance—it’s about honest, flexible, showing up to the moments in all your relationships.

👉 Grab the book or explore the free tools on my website and start owning your moments before they own you.